Saying goodbye
Saying goodbye is a deeply personal experience for both carers and the children in their care. At CASPA, we know that every placement is unique, and endings can bring a mix of emotions: joy, sadness, pride, or even uncertainty. Whatever the circumstances, parting ways doesn’t diminish the care, love, and stability you’ve provided during the time you’ve shared.
Why placements end
The end of a placement doesn’t mean failure, it’s simply a part of the fostering journey. Placements may end for many reasons, and each one is an opportunity to support a young person as they take their next step.
- Planned transitions
These happen when a child is ready to reunite with their biological family or move into permanent care with a guardian or adoptive family. Planned moves involve preparation and collaboration between carers, the child, their family, and their care team to ensure a smooth and positive transition. - Unexpected changes
Sometimes, circumstances change, and a placement needs to end sooner than expected. If you feel a placement isn't working, it’s important to reach out to your caseworker as soon as possible. They’ll assist you to either support the current placement or find the best solution for the child’s next steps.
Preparing for goodbye
When the time comes to say goodbye, it’s natural to feel a wave of emotions. Reflect on the journey you’ve shared and focus on ways to make this transition meaningful for both you and the child.
When the goodbye is planned, use your remaining time together to create positive memories.
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- Write a heartfelt letter celebrating their strengths and the time you spent together.
- Create a scrapbook or memory box filled with photos, drawings, and keepsakes.
- Spend quality time together doing something they love, whether it’s a picnic, a favourite meal, or a trip to the park.
- Reassure them about the changes ahead and remind them of how far they’ve come.
Unplanned goodbyes can be more challenging, but your role remains essential in providing stability and care through the transition. Work closely with your caseworker to make sure the child feels supported.
Supporting the young person
Children and young people process transitions in their own way. Some may feel excited or hopeful about what’s next, while others might experience anxiety, sadness, or confusion. Your caseworker will guide the process, but here are some ways you can help:
- Focus on the positives of the move and what the child can look forward to.
- Let them express their feelings, whether through conversations, art, or play.
- Involve them in packing their belongings and ensure they take everything that’s meaningful to them, from toys and clothes to schoolwork and mementos.
- If appropriate, discuss how you can stay in touch to provide ongoing support.
Staying connected
In some cases, maintaining contact after a placement ends can provide a child with a sense of consistency and support. Your caseworker will explore whether this is in the child’s best interest and help establish boundaries if everyone agrees. Even if contact isn’t possible, the positive memories and lessons you’ve shared will stay with the child as they continue to grow.
Reflecting on your role
It’s important to remind yourself that placements ending doesn’t mean failure. Whether planned or unplanned, these transitions are a natural part of fostering. Not every placement is a perfect fit, and that’s okay. What matters most is that you’ve provided stability, care, and love during their time with you.
Take time to process your emotions and lean on your support network. Talk to your caseworker or other carers, and focus on the impact you’ve made. Every placement, no matter how long or short, leaves a lasting impression on a child’s life.
By embracing every goodbye with compassion and strength, you help ensure that each child leaves with memories of love, stability, and hope for their future.